In You Will I Trust

This album of Scripture Lullabies - Hidden In My Heart first became a good friend during another sleepless night. (Even though I recognize music after one hearing, it usually takes a few times through new songs to get past the "new acquaintance" stage for me.)  Now these cinematic orchestrations and Bible-based lyrics so beautifully help reset my mind on the truth during stressful and physically weak days.

Running a search just now on my blog, I am surprised not to find any mention of this series of albums before. Ever since I first heard of Jay Stocker's Scripture Lullabies (only 1 album back then) through the ministry of Revive Our Hearts and bought it to help Aunt Dorothy rest in the afternoons, they have been a big part of our life.

Besides blessing and calming us many days and nights at home, I played them through earbuds every time I was in the claustrophobic scanning machines for post-cancer checkups. We also give them to most new babies among our family and friends, as well as to hurting adult-friends. 

Check out the series here: Scripture-Lullabies.com

A favorite song from Volume IV which keeps playing through my mind and heart is based on Psalm 91:

In You Will I Trust
Listen Here

I will dwell in the secret place
Of the Most High God
I will abide under the shadow of the Almighty
Surely You will deliver me
You will make a way
With Your outstretched wings, Lord, You cover me
You will hold me close
Never let me go

I will say of the Lord You are my refuge
And my fortress
My God in You will I trust
In You will I trust

I will not fear the terror by night
Nor the arrow that flies by day
And when a thousand fall then ten thousand more
I’ll stand firm
You will give angels charge over me
Keep me in all my ways
They will lift me up, God You’ll hold me up
You’re my shield and strength
I won’t be afraid

No evil will befall me
The serpent has no power
I will set my love upon You
God You deliver, You will deliver me

I will say of the Lord You are my refuge
And my fortress
My God in You will I trust
In You will I trust

A Shepherd Explains

One reason I appreciate audio-books is as a great way to re-read a book I first enjoyed in print. A recent audio-read was A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23 by Phillip Keller. So good!



Packed with the author's real life experiences in the rugged life of sheep-ranching, his insights breathe life and meaning into every word of this familiar song written by the ancient shepherd, David.

And the life-applications go deep. Such as when Keller illuminates the phrase "You anoint my head with oil" - which for sheep includes treating pests and scab picked up by rubbing heads with other sheep:

"Often it is when we “get our heads together” with someone else who may not necessarily have the mind of Christ, that we come away imbued with concepts that are not Christian.

"Our thoughts, our ideas, our emotions, our choices, our impulses, drives and desires are all shaped and molded through the exposure of our minds to other people’s minds. In our modern era of mass communication, the danger of the “mass mind” grows increasingly grave. Young people in particular, whose minds are so malleable find themselves being molded under the subtle pressures and impacts made on them by television, radio, magazines, newspapers, and fellow classmates, to say nothing of their parents and teachers."

Note: Can you believe this was first published in 1970?! It sounds like today. Especially the next bit... (emphasis mine)

"Often the mass media which are largely responsible for shaping our minds are in the control of men whose characters are not Christlike: who in some cases are actually anti-Christian. One cannot be exposed to such contacts without coming away contaminated. 

"The thought patterns of people are becoming increasingly abhorrent. Today we find more tendency to violence, hatred, prejudice, greed, cynicism, and increasing disrespect for that which is noble, fine, pure or beautiful. This is precisely the opposite of what Scripture teaches us. In Philippians 4:8 we are instructed emphatically in this matter…



"There are those who seem unable to realize His control of their minds and thoughts. It is a simple matter of faith and acceptance. Just as one asks Christ to come into the life initially to assure complete control of one’s conduct, so one invites the Holy Spirit to come into one’s conscious and subconscious mind to monitor one’s thought-life. Just as by faith we believe and know and accept and thank Christ for coming into our lives, so by simple faith and confidence in the same Christ, we believe and know and accept with thanks the coming (or anointing) of His gracious Spirit upon our minds. Then having done this, we simply proceed to live and act and think as He directs us.

"The difficulty is that some of us are not in dead earnest about it. Like a stubborn sheep we will struggle, kick and protest when the Master puts His hand upon us for this purpose. Even if it is for our own good, we still rebel and refuse to have Him help us when we need it so desperately.

"In a sense we are a stiff-necked lot and were it not for Christ’s continuing compassion and concern for us, most of us would be beyond hope or help. Sometimes I am quite sure Christ comes to us and applies the oil of His own Spirit to our minds in spite of our own objections. Were this not so, where would most of us be? Surely every gracious thought that enters my mind had its origins in Him."

A Shepherd Looks at Psalm 23 by Phillip Keller

Now, that's our Good Shepherd who humbled Himself to come to us as a vulnerable baby. Let's celebrate Him this Christmas!

Merry Christmas! 
In His love,
Hannah

"Come, Sheep!"

That is how Dad called his little flock of Lincoln-Finn sheep (who were our lawn-mowers when we moved out into the country 35 years ago). Some of my earliest memories involve our huge ewes and bouncy lambs.

I would love to have a recording of my girl-voice trying to mimic Dad's sheep-call when I was feeding them or just wanted to gather my wooly friends for a visit. No wonder I turned out to sing alto - as I did always did my best to mimic Dad's baritone call with extra stress on the second word:

"Come, SHEEP!"

For some reason, the sheep weren't fooled. I had to shake a bucket of corn if I really wanted them to come running. Why? They didn't know or trust my voice in the same way as that of their main shepherd.

This came to mind again when reading John 10:

"He who enters by the door is the shepherd of the sheep... The sheep hear his voice, and he calls his own sheep by name and leads them out. When he has brought out all his own, he goes before them, and the sheep follow him, for they know his voice. A stranger they will not follow, but they will flee from him, for they do not know the voice of strangers."

Jesus goes on to say, " I am the good shepherd. I know my own and my own know me... and I lay down my life for the sheep."

How can we know His voice and not be fooled by counterfeits or dangerous enemies?

His words are in the Bible. Let's learn to know His voice better each day so we can follow the Good Shepherd!

Waiting Room Hymns

 

On my first visit to Dr. V. (see previous post) seven years ago, I was blessed to hear a hymn playing in the waiting room: "Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus." Not that they were playing Christian music. Somehow, this one just ended up on the mixed album they were playing that day. Actually, I know how... a loving God was taking care of His hurting, scared child in the way He knew would touch her best.

For years I had forgotten that special moment until I was just now recalling another special gift from just this week. At my final appointment with this amazing doctor (the day before she retired) I was brought to tears by once again hearing a hymn among the variety of modern and classical "background music." It was the perfect hymn for this day of saying goodbye to the doctor who was able to diagnose Elsa and me and help our bodies begin to dig out of a decade of damage, as well as who found my thyroid cancer when it was only stage one. As we moved into a future of more unknowns, I heard notes and harmonies that told me:

"Be still, my soul! the Lord is on thy side;
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;"

And then the lines that really got me...

"Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change He faithful will remain.

"Be still, my soul! thy best, thy heav'nly Friend
Thro' thorny ways leads to a joyful end."

My doctor called me for a blood draw just then, so I had to explain the tears. As she entered her own season of changes and unknowns, she had to try to keep back the tears too.

P.S. - As a bonus, this last appointment also contained a second hymn: "Jesus, Keep Me Near the Cross"

[Pictures from camping near our clinic this week.]

The First Pansy Book

Ready for a brand-new, free audio-book?

[My apologies if you already read this post a few weeks ago. I thought it was published but now found it in my drafts folder - along with several others that were automatically deleted based on false accusations but reinstated once reviewed.]

A pen-pal/friend (with whom I have worked on LibriVox since my first book) brought this children's book to my attention as one she had wished to personally record. While that was not possible for her at this time, she really wanted to get it into the hands of listeners - thinking it could be a special resource for families who are spending more time at home now. We were able to get it completed with the help of other volunteers - thanks to the typed version of this public domain text shared with us by isabellamacdonaldalden.com. 

Book summary:

Twelve year old Helen is determined to be a good girl, but the harder she tries, the worse her days go. Is there any hope? And what made such a change in the life of her grown-up brother in the seven years he was away from home? Little do the Lesters know what a pivotal year this will be in each of their lives.



The story behind the story:

"Pansy" is the pen-name of Isabella MacDonald Alden. (1841-1930)

When a friend urged her to submit the manuscript to a contest sponsored by the American Reform Tract and Book Society of Cincinnati, Ohio, her response was, "I'll do no such thing. If I can't write a better story than that, it proves that I ought never to write at all. Tear the thing into bits and throw it in the grate with the other rubbish. I'll set fire to them to-night."

Without her knowledge, this friend sent in the manuscript. Two months later, Isabella was stunned to learn her that first book was to be published. (1865)

[Does this remind anyone else of "Anne of Green Gables/Avonlea"?!]

"I like to recall the reason why it won the fifty dollar prize. Because, in the opinion of the committee of award it met the condition imposed by the grand old Christian gentleman who offered the prize. It was to be given for the manuscript that would best explain God's plan of salvation, so plainly that quite young readers would have no difficulty in following its teachings if they would, and so winsomely that some of them might be moved to take Jesus Christ for their Saviour and Friend."

(Click here for more of the story.)

Sing in the Storm

"The birds, the poets of the animal creation—what though they never get beyond the lyrical! —awoke to utter their own joy, and awake like joy in others of God's children."

George MacDonald in Alec Forbes of Howglen

Our bright and cheery-voiced Baltimore Orioles came back to us May 10th!

"How cheery the bird song which was going on in spite of everything! Or perhaps the birds found no fault with the rain. I want to be like that, said Rotha to herself; not to be out of the storm, but to be able to sing through it. And that is what people are meant to do, I think."

Susan Warner in The Letter of Credit

[one of last summer's stray robin-nestlings]

A Day of Little Joys

May 1, 2021 ~ A day of Little Joys

▪︎ I headed out to the lawn with my camp chair this morning, almost too ill to sit up and knit. But I was instantly amazed with temperatures that made me shed layers in the sunshine! (After nights in the 30's...)

▪︎ What should I spot at my feet, but some volunteer pansies!

▪︎ Looking closely at the nearby barberry bush showed tiny gems.

▪︎ The tulips are finally getting back to growing after coming up and then pausing for weeks of cold and snow-showers.

▪︎ Even the dandelions look cheerful today!

▪︎ Our cats love having us out with them.

▪︎ The various characters of bird songs make me grin.

▪︎ A mitten came to life as some of my strength returned.

▪︎ Exciting reports arrived of a busy day at the greenhouses where Dad and Mom were helping.

Sleepless Nights

April 29, 2021

Thankfully these sleepless nights where staying in bed is counterproductive are getting less common over the years. But I am also thankful to have learned to view them as a special time. I am not just sitting in the dark and pain alone, feeling my gut churning from another treatment that hit too hard. I also have hours to be ministered to by audio Bibles, audiobooks, podcasts, sermons...

This night I knit in the company of some sweet, encouraging ladies. Thanks to Leslie Ludy of Set Apart Girl for the "Beauty for Ashes" interviews with Annie W. and with Grace M. of Across Fields Studio!

[Have I mentioned before how I love the "Further Up & Further In" sticker by Grace on my computer?!]

Harpers

A couple weeks ago, Joseph's inquisitive, little, music-loving ears had a new experience - a folk harp and tenor recorder duet! Something we haven't tried for years...

How fun to hear little bits of Elsa's harp again since it was repaired and re-strung last month! While we were doctoring in the Mississippi River valley, the Marion Folk Harp was getting it's own doctoring back at its birthplace. 

Every time Joseph visits he first looks for the harp. Those little fingers can hardly keep away, so we are trying to teach him to pluck gently!

Will we have another harper in the family someday?!

Can You Prove it False?

 

While the storyline of There and Back is full of memorable characters, suspense, conflict, love, life, and growth... George MacDonald never fails to weave in thought-provoking conversations.

[Please never take his word for ultimate truth, but rather check it against the Bible, as MacDonald was a fallible man with some unorthodox beliefs. That said, his works contain many gems that draw me closer to the Saviour.]

A God that could be proved, 

would not be worth proving.

There and Back by George MacDonald

"That the unprovable is necessarily the unknowable, a thousand beliefs deny. 'You cannot prove to me that you have a father!' says the blind sage, reasoning with the little child. 'Why should I prove it?' answers the child. 'I am sitting on his knee! If I could prove it, that would not make you see him; that would not make you happy like me! You do not care about my father, or you would not stand there disputing; you would feel about until you found him!'...

"If a man say, 'I cannot believe; I was not made to believe what I could not prove;' I reply, Do you really say, 'It is not true,' because you have no proof? Ask yourself whether you do not turn from the idea because you prefer it should not be true. You accept a thousand things without proof, and a thousand things may be perfectly true, and have no proof. But if you cannot be sure, why therefore do you turn away? Is the thing assuredly false? Then you ought of course to turn away. Can you prove it false? You cannot. Again, why do you turn away? That a thing is not assuredly true, cannot be reason for turning from it, else farewell to all theory and all scientific research!...

"But," said Barbara, "perhaps the man would say that we see such suffering in the world, that the being who made it, if there be one, cannot possibly be both strong and good, otherwise he would not allow it." 

"Say then, that he might be both strong and good, and have some reason for allowing, or even causing it, which those who suffer will themselves one day justify, ready for the sake of it to go through all the suffering again. Less than that would not satisfy me."

There and Back by George MacDonald

The entire audiobook can be downloaded for free at https://librivox.org/there-and-back-by-george-macdonald/

Good Fiction

 As a reader and a sailor, I love this quote I once heard attributed to C.S. Lewis:

"Good fiction is a ship carrying a cargo of truth."

During these 7 years of disabling chronic illness, Elsa and I have probably read more books and audiobooks than in the combined decades preceding. But while we used to read a higher percentage of heavier books both for school and for leisure, these years have leaned toward more fiction - especially children's fiction. 

If you have dealt with chronic illness, you will understand the ways it can weaken the brain and nerves - to the point where we still can't handle many good books and movies we used to enjoy. There are even whole sections of the Bible that I cannot listen to in a dramatised version, and historial non-fiction and biography often needs some fast-forwarding nowdays.

In a way it is a gift to be extra sensitive to any hint of evil, sin, and violence, but it also makes it harder to live as an adult in this world where every day's news can be gut-wrenching nightmare-material to our adrenally-exhausted bodies.

To find enough books to keep enjoying and learning from in a low-key way, we often turn to LibriVox.org. As mentioned in the past, it has also been a joy for me to occasionally record books or chapters for free audiobooks that others can then enjoy. This is the fulfillment of a long-ago dream which I had given up for years. How amazing that this dream was given back to me when life as I knew it had crumbled.

For the last many of Grandpa's 103 years of life, he was nearly blind. This was hard for a serious reader, so audiobooks from the library became a part of his daily life. But the options for good audiobooks were much more limited back then. How I wished I could record favorite books for him, but copyright issues prevented that idea. It wasn't until I ended up couch-bound and dependent on audiobooks myself that I learned of LibriVox. By then it was too late for me to record for Grandpa. But what a joy it is to now see others being blessed by the work, even while I am still learning to improve these skills.

It has also been neat to gain new friends around the world through this work, some of whom have led me to even more new [old] books. 

In hopes that this combined experience can help others, I have begun sharing family-friendly book and audiobook ideas, samples, and reviews under the name "Storytime with HannahMary." (HannahMary is my reader name on LV.)

Keep checking back for more book and audiobook ideas on
Instagram: @storytime.with.hannahmary

YouTube: Storytime with Hannah Mary

Lessons from the Pilgrims, Part 5: 400 Years Later

 

As I keep listening to Bradford's "Of Plimoth Plantation", the following thoughts came together on my Instagram account @chronic.hannah 

"They fell upon their knees and blessed the God of heaven."
- Pilgrim William Bradford 

It's Thanksgiving! If you think about the important history behind this celebration, you likely picture the Pilgrims dressed in their finest, feasting with their new neighbors - the native American Indians. You remember that they celebrated for days and enjoyed games and competitions.

But I am getting a much clearer picture of the setting for this event as I listen through the history recorded by Pilgrim Governor William Bradford (just search his name on LibriVox.org for the free audiobook.) Within a few months of arrival to their new home (an inhospitable wilderness with insufficient supplies, reached by a perilous journey after years of persecution and exile), half of the Pilgrims had died.

Besides years lacking basic supplies, clothing, and most of all - food, the Pilgrims would now face empty promises, deceit, and betrayal by members of their funding organization back home and from new settlers joining them only in hopes of personal gain.

How did they respond? By seeking God's wisdom, trusting Him for provision, seeking to love and serve their enemies, and, yes, GIVING THANKS!

I think the Pilgrims would be appalled at the tone of Thanksgiving now. Theirs was no vague "feeling" of gratitude for their blessings. They thanked GOD. When they had endless reasons for fear, discouragement, and complaint, they chose to look up and remember God's love and faithfulness.

400 years later, I need to learn from the Pilgrims. And not just on Thanksgiving Day!

"Are You Ready?" - The Princess and Curdie

· Now, Curdie, are you ready?" she said
· Yes, ma'am, answered Curdie.
· You do not know what for.
· You do, ma'am. That is enough.
· You could not have given me a better answer,
   or done more to prepare yourself, Curdie.

[from The Princess and Curdie by George MacDonald]

To hear a short sample of my free audiobook recording 

of The Princess and Curdie, click here.

The entire audiobook can be downloaded for free here.

This book is a sequel to The Princess and the Goblin 

- a lifelong favorite of mine that grows better every time 

I read it. Make sure to read that book before Curdie! 

A British gentleman did a lovely job recording that 

free audiobook - available here.

Fluttering Wings

In a morning hour on the deck before the muggy day gets too hot, wings are dominant in my surroundings. Flies dive in to crawl on my chair or lap, a cloud of miniscule bugs dances like a tornado in the sun over a nearby rosebush, busy parents dart past to feed voracious nestlings, and in a puddle on the driveway a family of robins takes a splashing bath.

But just inches from my knees is a wondrous fluttering, or rather, a buzzing hum of wings. The tall spikes of the salvia in our planter (inspired by a design of Jason's) is a favorite with hummingbirds. I have just been too slow, and apparently too threatening with the camera to catch those airy visits for you.

But a couple yards off the flitting butterflies are less shy... or more persistent. 

Be Still Again

If one began reading my blog in the past couple of years, they may wonder what it has to do with "being still." Yes, we are growing stronger and filling our days more than when I began to blog, though Elsa aptly summarized our days as still falling into the categories of "sick" and "sicker" when I was having trouble dragging this body through a day last week.

We thankfully came home from another week of travels for 6-month doctor appointments  recently with no new diagnoses (for the second time in a row!) But the strain of that trip combined with many other triggers for our bodies this spring have set us back.

Of course there are the simply "sick" days when we are so much stronger than we used to be that it is a thrill to tackle some house cleaning or gardening. 

I finally got our table-grapes freed from
several years' accumulation of dead canes. 

Then follows a night with four or less hours of sleep due to adrenal fatigue and a "sicker" day when we go into survival mode with knitting and audiobooks. (C. S. Lewis' "Chronicles of Narnia" have been great for re-listening together.)

And when the "sicker" days pile up for a variety of reasons, we once again reach the "sickest" days when there isn't even enough strength to knit and no appetite to eat. Then I am reminded that I have been pushing too hard again and forgetting to "be still" enough. These are the times to take naps both before and after breakfast,

...quietly look at the beauties with which God has surrounded me,

...and review the truths memorised on stronger days.

By the way, we have been greatly blessed in this area by a free, new app designed in part by a friend of ours. See SonicBiblia.org for a great way to memorise and meditate on God's word! This web app even includes an audio Bible for listening to whole chapters at a time.