Making Beauty in Hard Places... Stitch by Stitch

Mom just got her biggest crochet project ironed up and on the table last night! I always love the morning light in this space, and now it is more amazing than ever!

This tablecloth project has traveled many miles, and since it was not a straight-through effort but picked up for occasional seasons, it has been growing for several years. Much of the work was done in family evenings to the accompaniment of audiobooks.

Some of it grew through the painful recovery from knee replacement. And the final stitches were put in while walking through a month of treatments with Dad at Mayo clinic. 

Faithfulness in the hard places. One stitch at a time. It all adds up to something beautiful!

"For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven...
 I have seen the business that God has given to the children of man to be busy with. 
He has made everything beautiful in its time. "
Ecclesiastes 3:1, 10

Sawing and Shedding Old Shells

Photos 1&2: After a chainsaw workout.

3: Before. A painful place to mow.

Yes, muscles that have hardly been used in over a decade put up a fuss for a while. But I still count it a "win" to be able to do something like this! (And thanks to Dad for picking up most of the branches as I had to run to town after sawing and mowing.)

Meanwhile, I got to see a cicada crawl out of its old shell and change those little green ripples into wings! So amazing! A first for me.

A strange shape and slight movement caught my eye at the base of a tree. The legs moved so slowly and looked so weak for the immense job at hand. But I was watching when the old, worthless exoskeleton dropped away and the tender body began to expand and harden! Then I checked back in an hour or so and found delicate wings!

Sometimes healing the limbic system / nervous system and connected physical issues can feel like that painfully slow and weak crawl out of an old, dead shell of a life. And then you break free in one area only to be held back in another. 

But God is at work, bringing new life. Eventually the wings unfurl and harden, and it will be time to fly and sing for joy again! (Yes, I like to think of the shrill sound of a cicada as its God-given song which glorifies Him.)

So, keep persevering on your way out of whatever exuviae God wants to set you free from! It's time to molt and grow!

~ Hannah

Brain Rewiring Newsletter & Encouraging Phone Wallpapers

 I have only mentioned Brain Rewiring a few times on this blog, but it is still a daily focus in this healing journey. So much so that I am just starting a newsletter for those who are interesting in learning more about healing the Limbic System and lowering the Chronic Stress Response from a Biblical perspective. 

This monthly [at most] offering contains:
- Mindset & Brain Rewiring Tips
- Biblical Encouragement
- Free Phone Wallpaper Download

You are welcome to sign up here: Hannah's Newsletter

As it says at the above link: 

Nearly a decade into her chronic illness journey, Hannah was led to Brain Rewiring to begin to heal her Limbic System which was stuck in the Chronic Stress Response. Due to the intricate brain/body connection, this focus on healing at deeper levels is having positive physical impacts and helping Hannah get back to LIFE!

Shifting Perspective from "I Have To"

Do you find yourself slogging through your days with the "I Have To..." perspective? 

#1: The first step out is to bring awareness to the negative thought pattern. 

#2: Next, purposely replace that thought with a smile and the words "I Get To!" Even if it feels forced at first, your brain will eventually start to believe your new words.

#3: Look for little joys in each task! 

I also like to recite this verse while working:

"And you shall rejoice before the Lord your God in all that you undertake."

• Deuteronomy 12:18 

Enjoy this in a brief video format here: Perspective Shift: I Get To

Amos Fortune: free man

Amos Fortune: free man by Elizabeth Yates is one of those children's books that is meaningful and inspiring no matter what age you read it. I first met Amos Fortune this winter of 2022. Even though he died in 1801, I say "met," because he was a man whom everyone would want for a friend. 

Despite all the pain he came through - including being captured by another tribe and sold into slavery in his teens, spending decades earning money to buy the freedom of more than just himself, losing loved ones, and sometimes being mistreated - Amos had a soft and grateful heart. 

It wasn't easy, but he lived out his faith in a very practical way and learned the value of following Jesus' direction to turn the other cheek.

"Amos watched the fire climb slowly at first, starting from a dozen different places; then like a wall of destruction it moved up the steep sides until the flames met and linked in a vast pyramid of fire at the summit, consuming everything that could be consumed and leaving the mountain bare and smoldering.

"Hate could do that to a man, Amos thought, consume him and leave him smoldering. But he was a free man, and free at a great cost, and he would not put himself in bondage again."

His gravestone in New Hampshire reads:

Sacred

to the memory of

Amos Fortune

who was born free in

Africa a slave in America

he purchased liberty

professed Christianity

lived reputably and

died hopefully

Nov. 17, 1801

Aet. 91

Picking up a Brush Again

Watercolor has really gone into a slump around here the past few months - as can be seen by what I turn out when picking up a brush again.

I do realize that the high inflammation and pain levels which hit me each autumn play a big part in disconnecting brain from fingertips. Creativity can't be forced when it is hard to simply draw breath or sit normally due to pain. But more closely observing a bit of beauty while watching the flow and mingle of watercolors is still so therapeutic that I want to push through this slump and see what can come of it.

The first Sunday afternoon of December marked the start of this experiment. When a quick attempt at our first amaryllis of the season failed miserably, I turned to a favorite tutorial by Camilla Damsbo to gain inspiration again. 

It forced me to loosen up, speed up, and use more water... which was much-needed in our bone-dry winter home. And while the results are still far from what I envisioned, it brought some joy back to the process.

Then a Monday afternoon walk to the compost pile through the cold, crunching snow gave me a sunset view to try. As subtle as our winter skies can be, it was fun to try a mix of techniques for this little landscape.

The second Sunday I tried adding ink lines to the Damsbo poppies piece (as shown in the tutorial here)...

...before tackling our favorite succulents for a second time. 

Not happy with the results (rough, hard edges and too dark on the lightest values), I went back to knitting my handspun wool for the rest of the afternoon! 

So, though it still takes a strong will to pull out the paints and brushes, knowing I won't find even the so-so results I was used to some months ago, I hope to keep finding ways to make the process more enjoyable again.

Stepping Stones

"[The Pilgrims] had a great hope and inward zeal of laying a good foundation, for the propagation and advancing of the kingdom of Christ in those remote parts of the world; yea though they should be but even as stepping stones unto others."

- William Bradford

Thanksgiving - A Time to Remember

What was it like at the first Thanksgiving celebration? How did things go for the Pilgrims in the next few years?... 

As a bonus post for today (don't miss the main post from this morning!), here is a link to a live read-aloud I did last night from Barbara Rainey's book Thanksgiving - A Time to Remember. You may be surprised at the answers to the above questions!

Click here to watch on YouTube

Praise God From Whom All Blessings Flow!

Of Plymouth Plantation

Do you ever wonder why you celebrate Thanksgiving Day? 

Is it for family time? Good food? Entertainment and a football game? Or to "be thankful"... without any specific object of your gratitude?

Finishing the following book last week was perfect timing to remember why we really have this celebration.

Even if only to put our own hardships into perspective, reading this first-hand account of the Pilgrims through several decades following their arrival in America on the Mayflower is eye-opening. But it also shows clearly how much these men and women of God were willing to sacrifice for the freedom to worship Him.

If you ever had the idea (like I used to) that all went well for the Pilgrims after the first good harvest and Thanksgiving festivities, this history would amaze you with year upon year of perseverance through famine, lack, danger, sickness, and injustice. And yet William Bradford, having lost his wife soon after arrival to this wilderness and under great pressure trying to govern this new colony could write as follows. 

What, then, could now sustain them but the spirit of God, and His grace? Ought not the children of their fathers rightly to say: Our fathers were Englishmen who came over the great ocean, and were ready to perish in this wilderness; but they cried unto the Lord, and He heard their voice, and looked on their adversity. ... Let them therefore praise the Lord, because He is good, and His mercies endure forever. Yea, let them that have been redeemed of the Lord, show how He hath delivered them from the hand of the oppressor. When they wandered forth into the desert-wilderness, out of the way, and found no city to dwell in, both hungry and thirsty, their soul was overwhelmed in them. Let them confess before the Lord His loving kindness, and His wonderful works before the sons of men!

• Bradford's History of the Plymouth Settlement,
Rendered into Modern English by Harold Paget

Happy Thanksgiving!

The Door in the Wall

What a sweet, little book I last read from my nephew’s collection!

How often do we feel like we have just hit a wall? The way we thought we were supposed to go is blocked. Our hopes are dashed. We can’t go forward, so what can we do?!

In the imagery of this book… keep walking along the wall until you find a door.

"'Each of us has his place in the world,’ he said. ‘If we cannot serve in one way, there is always another. If we do what we are able, a door always opens to something else.'"

The Door in the Wall by Marguerite De Angeli

Or, as Elisabeth Elliot put it: 

"Do the next thing."

And one more quote that I shared two years ago:

"And when she could no longer hope, she did not stand still but walked on in the dark. I think when the sun rises upon them, some people will be astonished to find how far they have got on in the dark."

Paul Faber by George MacDonald

[P.S. - Paul Faber is in the process of being recorded by a group of volunteers over at LibriVox.org. Want to join us?!]

His Father said...

Here's an encouraging bit of Amy Carmichael in the little book from Dohnavur Fellowship called His Thoughts said... His Father said...

"His thoughts said, The way is rough.
     His Father said, But every step
     bringeth thee nearer to thy Home.

"His thoughts said, The fight is fierce.
     His Father said, He who is near to
     his Captain is sure to be a target
     for the archers.

"His thoughts said, The night is long.
     His Father said, But joy cometh
     in the morning."

     • Amy Carmichael

Read more excerpts in this earlier post.

A Day of Little Joys

May 1, 2021 ~ A day of Little Joys

▪︎ I headed out to the lawn with my camp chair this morning, almost too ill to sit up and knit. But I was instantly amazed with temperatures that made me shed layers in the sunshine! (After nights in the 30's...)

▪︎ What should I spot at my feet, but some volunteer pansies!

▪︎ Looking closely at the nearby barberry bush showed tiny gems.

▪︎ The tulips are finally getting back to growing after coming up and then pausing for weeks of cold and snow-showers.

▪︎ Even the dandelions look cheerful today!

▪︎ Our cats love having us out with them.

▪︎ The various characters of bird songs make me grin.

▪︎ A mitten came to life as some of my strength returned.

▪︎ Exciting reports arrived of a busy day at the greenhouses where Dad and Mom were helping.

Sleepless Nights

April 29, 2021

Thankfully these sleepless nights where staying in bed is counterproductive are getting less common over the years. But I am also thankful to have learned to view them as a special time. I am not just sitting in the dark and pain alone, feeling my gut churning from another treatment that hit too hard. I also have hours to be ministered to by audio Bibles, audiobooks, podcasts, sermons...

This night I knit in the company of some sweet, encouraging ladies. Thanks to Leslie Ludy of Set Apart Girl for the "Beauty for Ashes" interviews with Annie W. and with Grace M. of Across Fields Studio!

[Have I mentioned before how I love the "Further Up & Further In" sticker by Grace on my computer?!]